I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize