Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
