He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
