whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
the day after is always just damage control
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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