you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
