she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
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Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
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I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
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