who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize