Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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