have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
