I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
