Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home