i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
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she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
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When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia