so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
