Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
