He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
