didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
