So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You're a waste of cheezeits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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