You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
