Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
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