Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!