And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
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Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize