she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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