I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
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it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
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you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
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