Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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