Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
