Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
she looked like the before picture.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
