She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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