i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize