Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
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He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize