Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I don't deserve a penis
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
