wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
