Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Randomize
