we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
