are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I can't put those talents on a resume
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize