Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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