Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
