Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I wish i was in the wii world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Randomize