Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.