Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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