my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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