There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
These tits shall not be calmed
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
