Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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