fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
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