I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize