you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?