My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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