She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize