two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
