come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
