You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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