What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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