Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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